Ever blamed your heart wrenching pain (in the context of your love experience) on the fact that you loved too much?? If you have, then take a seat with me because this is our table!
The essence of this post is to lift your focus from a lower perspective, to a much higher one. So you can build a much more stable relationship emotionally.
There's a popular saying that goes...
"If you want to reach for the moon, aim for the stars" we all know the stars are placed higher than the moon right?
This post sprung from a sunday sermon, when Pastor spoke casually about his defense mechanism on relative issues that results from being too emotionally attached.
He said "... for me I constantly stretch my love for her(his wife) by asking myself, what can she possibly do that would HURT so much?" The essence is to think on a wide range, and then extend your compassion to cover their lapses, so that when it eventually happens, your emotions would have been properly padded to evade casualties 😅. No kidding! This is what you naturally would do for someone you've built your life around because if they lose, you lose!
Before I'd properly digest this, I'd like to share a weird trait.
Weird trait:
In all of my relationships with the other gender, I get really attached to them in such short notice! I shut the world and build my world around these set of persons.weird right? I know!
This does more damage to me emotionally, than the intended good EVERY SINGLE TIME because until recently, my emotional shock-observer had not been properly built (i wasn't anchored to a much greater focus), so any small hoodlum behaviour can hurt my heart like a heart attack, especially if on the flip side, I'd have put them first on my priority list. Now these things are what you (I) could have easily overlooked, if we had been consistent with our compassion exercise. You get my point?
Being emotionally attached to someone or other material stuff isn't a bad thing par say, but most often, huge expectations come from being attached above normalcy. Dont get me wrong, I'm not saying care less, but caring so much to give allowances. Imagine that your tailor making a slim fit without a bit of room??? Ouch! Look away!
Oh, and pastor concluded the previous statement with *not in verbatim* "... in hierarchy, it's God first. Then my wife...".
Phil 2 :13 puts things in perspective; "for it is God in us that causes us to will and to do, for his good purpose". I mean, who best aids you to loving right, than He himself who is love. Devoting that energy on a much surer and Constant being (God), builds some sort of an anchor, which forms an emotional stability.
In my case, after the recent experience with all the series of hoodlum behaviour... I don sofree wash my hand commot from anything wey concern emotional attachment to earthly things. Funny thing is, people would be people, but recently, I've been able to manage my emotions (thanks to the Holy Spirit).
But Hey! If you're looking for a more rewarding relationship where you could invest your 100% like me, it's in your relationship with God. He created love, and in fact, He is love! No one does it better than HE who started it, and owns it (1john 4:8-21). God is CONSTANT. Best believe it is HE who gives room for you, that even with all our lapses, HE already stretched his compassion wide enough, HE waits for you patiently and rewards your diligence in seeking him. He is the 'much higher focus'.
Choose your cross wisely, some dey wey you no suppose carry.
❤
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Comments
Makes sense!